


How To Photograph Sunlight

by innersanctuaries



Category: Original Work
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, M/M, Photography, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-26
Updated: 2019-03-26
Packaged: 2019-12-18 11:10:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18248639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/innersanctuaries/pseuds/innersanctuaries
Summary: James had spent his whole life avoiding the light, all until the day he met the brightest person he'd ever seen.





	How To Photograph Sunlight

**Author's Note:**

> I've never posted any of my original works, but hey, this is the best thing I've written in a LONG while. 
> 
> So, these are some characters I've had for a long time, and I love them with all my heart. I don't go into much description during the actual work, so I'll give some character descriptions.
> 
> James Mazur: Caucasian, slightly wavy dirty blonde hair that goes down to his chin, pale blue eyes. He's of Russian descent, and has a slight accent. 
> 
> Alex Iacovetti: Olive skin, wavy/curly medium brown hair that's constantly a total mess, hazel eyes. He's of Italian descent, with no accent.
> 
> Aria Hel: Caucasian, wavy/curly dyed dark red hair with bangs, the rest goes down to her shoulders. Heterochromia, one grey eye and one green eye. Polish descent, no accent.
> 
> Salome Yeboah: Black, dreadlocks that go down to mid-back and black hair. African-American, no accent. 
> 
> I'm just posting this to see how it all works out, hopefully it goes well and doesn't flop TOO badly. I hope you all enjoy this!

   You hate night lights. Mom turns them on in case you’re afraid of the monster under the bed. You’re not sure how to tell her that the light makes it worse. If the light is on, then the monster can see you. But it makes Mom happy, so you can be tough. You can be her strong little soldier. You put your armor on before you go to sleep next to your attack dog. Bones might be a chihuahua, but he likes protecting you.

 

   As you get older, you turn the night light off for good. You aren’t sure exactly when it happened, but you think the lightbulb burned out. Dad offers to change it, but nobody ever gets around to it. It’s okay, you and Bones are safer in the dark.

 

   Once you’re in school, you decide that you like doing your homework without the lights on. Mom gets angry and says you’ll ruin your eyesight, but she’s always surprised when she sees that your writing is neater when you do it in the dark. She makes you practice with the lights on and you learn to do it, but she doesn’t teach you to like it. You still do your homework in the dark whenever you get a chance to.

 

   Mom is pissed when she finds out that you did, in fact, ruin your eyesight. You’re happy that Dad drives you to the eye doctor, he doesn’t seem to mind. He lets you pick out pink frames for your glasses and glares at the person behind you in line when you put them on. They look away and he ruffles your hair. Mom really loves your new glasses.

 

   By the time you’re in middle school, you only wear pink glasses to spite everyone else. People tell you that you’re gay, but you just smile and tell them to get fucked. They stop telling on you sometime around the eighth grade because, well, they’re the ones who started it. Instead, they just knock you out. It gives you a new kind of appreciation for the dark. At least you don’t feel your broken nose when you’re unconscious.

 

   In your freshman year, Mom and Dad give you a few bucks to go raid Goodwill. You walk out with a lucky find, an old camera. Within the next few days, you’ve turned your bathroom into a darkroom. Your internet search history is full of questions about how to set one up and exactly how to use one.

 

   You take pictures of stupid things, but accidentally take the film out in the light and ruin the whole roll. This makes you realize pretty quickly that you’re going to need money for film. Like, a lot.

 

   A small art supply store calls you in for an interview, and you don’t think you’ve ever been more anxious than you are right then. The interviewer is a very nice old man named Wiggins. He sees your face and laughs at your expression when he tells you his name. Wiggins tells you that his parents just wanted to see him suffer. You’re really not sure whether or not he’s joking, but you laugh with him anyway.

 

   Wiggins calls you the day after the interview and asks you why you aren’t at work. You’ve never run more quickly than you do at this very moment. He’s very surprised when you get there and he sits you down to make you sip water. It’s a hundred degrees out, and you’re pretty sure you’re about to pass out. He tells you he was just kidding about coming into work and you see your vision start to go black around the edges. You actually do pass out.

 

   You do end up getting the job, and a year later you’re still glad you got it. The place carries all the film you could ever hope to have, and you get an employee discount. You’ve gotten pretty good at taking and developing pictures, mainly because Wiggins also loves photography. Sometimes you still screw up, but more often than not he’s telling you he wants to use your pictures on the ads for the store. You say yes as soon as he says he’ll give you free film for it.

 

   Mom tells you to go check out the school newspaper, so you do. They’re boring, but you offer to take pictures for them and they give you a monotone _Yeah sure whatever_. About a month later, the yearbook committee approaches you and asks if you’ll be their photographer. When they offer you a digital camera, you hand it back and tell them you’ll only do it if you can use your own. You win, and now you’re on the yearbook committee.

 

   You graduate and your grades are incredible. You get scholarships galore and universities are begging you to be their student. You say fuck off and go to some artsy college somewhere away from home. Wiggins is never going to admit it, but he did shed a tear when you said goodbye. Mom and Dad are crying as you walk to the airplane terminal. You say goodbye and tell them you’ll visit, because nothing could ever keep you from coming back. On the airplane, you learn that you’re terrified of flying and close your eyes the whole time. The dark behind your eyelids is comforting.

 

   Dorms are expensive, so you rent an apartment with a friend of your mom’s friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s dad’s kid. The apartment is on the top floor, and when you get up there you’re panting and sweating and dying a little bit. Your key is giving you trouble when the door swings open and you fall inside, camera still in hand. You twist your body so that your camera is safe when you hit the ground. Unfortunately, that means you land on your arm and break it. That’s how you end up in a car with your new roommate, who happens to be gorgeous.

 

  At the hospital, you spend your time wishing that the fall had killed you. Your roommate checks you in and says _Hello, my name is Alexander but you can call me Alex_ . You don’t really want to say anything back because your mouth tastes like something died in it after the long flight, but you manage to stutter out that _Hi, uh, my name is James and you can call me whatever and I’m really sorry and and and._ You’re really happy that you get dragged off to fix your arm before you can finish jamming your foot in your mouth.

 

   You offer to drive back home and wonder why Alex is looking at you weird before remembering that you have a cast on and can’t drive. Your face feels like it’s on fire when you quietly get into the car and try to forget that this is his first impression of you. The drive back was quiet, and you realize just how much of an idiot you’ve made of yourself. You’re completely aware that you look like a trash gremlin, while Alex looks like the sun itself, radiant and awe-inspiring. It takes a lot of self control not to smack yourself to stop waxing poetic about your new roommate.

 

  It’s a little awkward when you get back home, but you make up for it by making dinner. It isn’t the first or the last time you’ve made dinner with one hand, and it turns out pretty well. You’re worried when he disappears for a bit before coming back with a hot pink marker and saying _Come here, I’m going to be the first one to sign your cast!_ His signature takes up almost the whole cast, and you’re okay with that. You don’t let anyone else write on your cast.

 

   Over the next few days, you feel more and more comfortable around Alex. People have always said you’re “such a character”, but you’ve never really known what they meant. Maybe it’s this. It could mean Alex singing the Dora the Explorer theme song when he cleans and doing the sprinkler when your neighbors turn on their garbage music. But it could also mean the way he makes sure you’re taking care of your arm and helps you unpack the boxes that would have been left unopened otherwise.

 

   You find out that Alex really likes the light. That isn’t ideal, seeing as one of the windows shines straight into the bathroom you’ve claimed as your darkroom. You gear up for a big spat over it, but once you explain your need for a darkroom, he ushers you into the car and ignores your protests because _There’s too much light by the bathroom, it’ll ruin your pictures._ He drags you to the store to buy blackout curtains, and he somehow makes putting them up a fun task. They’re up by the end of the day, and suddenly you’re grinning just as wide as he is.

 

   Photography has always been something for you, not for others. Sure, you’ll show people once it’s all done and developed, but you just can’t seem to let people in on your process. It sounds cliche, but Alex is different. He’s actually interested in the process, and though he’s usually obnoxiously loud, he’s quiet and still as a mouse when you work. He swears that _I just want to watch, James, I want to learn about this._ You ask him why and he says _Because I want to be your friend, dummy_. You’re glad the room is dark to hide your blush and teach him how to develop pictures.

 

   You’ve been spending more time outside, and it’s always because of Alex. Some days he’ll come home and grab your hand, saying _James we have to go to the park, the ladybugs are out!_ Other times he looks like a kicked puppy and asks if _Hey do you think we can go somewhere?_ because he’s sad and doesn’t know what to do. You got your cast off ages ago, so you always say _Of course, let me get my camera first_. At some point he starts coming prepared, your camera already in hand. It never matters how tired you are, you can always make time for him.

 

  You also find out that you really like Alex. Not just like as a friend or whatever, you _like_ like him. It’s a problem, and you’re not sure how to explain away all the pictures you’ve taken of the times you spend together. It would be really awkward, having to tell him that his eyes and smile have made him come to love the light. So instead of confronting your problems, you decide to just never develop the pictures you take. You make one hundred percent sure that the film you used is out of place so he’ll never find it. That would be bad.

 

   Alex becomes a problem. He isn’t bad, he’s actually really good for you. You have friends now because he says _Dammit James, you need to get out more and no, all of my friends can’t be your friends!_ With that, you’re given the task of finding people you want to hang out with. Alex doesn’t push it too hard, but he does mention it until you finally groan _God fine I’ll do it just stop nagging and eat your damn pancakes you have school soon._

 

   You quietly curse at yourself for ever saying that, because it turns out that making friends is hard. There are plenty of people in your classes that are possible candidates, but none of them really bother looking twice at you. You’re walking out of your photography class when you see some guy cornering a scarily buff girl, smirking and saying _hey baby why don’t you just smile for me?_ You’re already on your way over and almost tell him to fuck off when she punches him in the throat and roundhouse kicks him away from her. That’s how you meet Salome.

 

  It doesn’t take long for you and Salome to become close. If you’re honest with yourself, she’s the sarcastic and prickly person nobody wants to be around, but she’s actually the sweetest girl you’ve run into. She makes you laugh, but not the way Alex makes you laugh. You think of how laughing with Alex makes your heart flutter and then push it to the back of your mind. That’s not important right now.

 

   You meet Salome’s girlfriend by watching a small girl get cornered by a guy, then watching her tase him and leave him groaning on the floor. She walks away with a drink in hand and her phone in the other, telling someone that _Hey babe, that taser I bought works great!_ Salome later introduces her to you as Aria, and she’s one of the sweetest people you’ve ever met. You’re still very careful not to piss her off.

 

   Alex and Salome meet. You suddenly regret everything because they’re a dynamic pranking duo. They stop when you nearly kill them because _I’ll take a lot of shit but my iced coffee tastes like salt now and you guys should be happy I’m letting you assholes live!_ Well, they mostly stop because Aria stares Salome down and pulls out her taser. Both of them hide behind you while begging for mercy.

 

   Alex is still by far the person you spend the most time with. Sometimes you think you’re around him too much, but then he beams at you and _You’re my best friend, James. Thanks for always being there for me._ You suddenly don’t think you’re around him too much.

 

   At some point, Alex goes from being curious about what you do in the darkroom and starts asking you _Can you teach me to be an expert photographer? One just like you, James!_ You open the blackout curtains by the darkroom and have him point out anything he wants to take pictures of outside. He ends up taking you both to a park an hour away because _I swear, I saw a flower I just need to have a picture of the other day._ The flower really was pretty, and he took pictures of it until the sun set. You take a few pictures of him with the sun shining on him and realize that the brightest thing in the photo is Alex. When he smiles at you and asks how he did, you can feel your heart melt a little.

 

   Aria says you should tell Alex you’re in love with him. Salome calls you a pussy when you insist you don’t love him. Aria punches her in the arm. You laugh and Aria punches you in the arm too for laughing at her girlfriend. All three of you laugh, and you silently thank the powers that be for making them forget about Alex.

 

   So he becomes more of a problem. You try to distance yourself because developing feelings for your roommate would indeed be bad. But he won’t let that happen. Alex decides that you need to have weekly movie nights. If it were up to him, they’d be every night, but you try to use the excuse that you have way too much homework. So he offers to help and he does so that’s how you end up having weekly movie nights. You can’t bring yourself to pretend to hate them, and you stop trying to distance yourself. That’s been kind of useless.

 

   An art supply store hires you. The interviewer’s name is something normal, like Dave. He doesn’t make you run there in hundred degree weather, and you’re actually kind of sad about it.

 

   One day you’re with Alex on movie night, because Fridays are movie nights, but it’s a little different. It’s not like you’re watching a romantic movie or anything, but you’re lying on the couch with your head in his lap and he looks at you and his eyes are hazel but they’re still somehow sunshine. You look at him and smile and he says _James, can I kiss you?_ You sit up and stare for a little while because you’re confused. You say _But I’m not gay_ , then you kiss him anyway.

 

   You are, in fact, very gay. Aria and Salome say _Oh my god finally we should go on double dates_ and you blush while Alex laughs and drops a kiss to the top of your head. It sends a little _zing!_ of warmth through you.

 

    About a year later, you buy another pair of glasses with pink frames. Alex says he loves them and you do too. You kiss him hard with the newfound confidence and light he’s helped you find. It’s been a year since he met you, and he’s told you that _yes James you looked like a gremlin but I love that gremlin_ . You say _I love you too even though you never look like a gremlin._ Alex just messes your hair up and nosedives into bed for a nap. You crawl into bed next to him because really, who can pass up a nap with their favorite person?

 

   Your parents call every so often and you tell them more about Alex, though you’re sure they’re sick of hearing you rant and rave about him all the time. You say hey mom, _I’m bringing Alex with me for the holidays, is that okay?_ She’s so happy that you can hear the tears in her eyes when she says yes and asks _What size shirt does he wear? Does he have any allergies? I don’t want to poison him with cookies, what a horrible way to die_. She’s just as happy as you are, but you know that you’re happier because you’ll be proposing next week and Alex is going to have a ring on his finger when he visits.

 

  It is a week later and you have the ring. You’re sneaky and snatched one of his rings for a day so you could get this one sized correctly, and he still doesn’t suspect a thing. He’s on his way home from work and you have dinner ready. The lightbulb burns out and you groan because _Goddammit that’s the third one this month, what kind of shit brand is Alex buying_ ? You use your phone’s flashlight to look for another bulb, and you get a call from Alex. You answer and say _Hey can you pick up some light bulbs before you get back_ , but you’re interrupted and suddenly you’re on your way to go identify the body.

 

  It is a month later and you’re bad at continuing on with life. Aria and Salome make sure you keep yourself alive and stay somewhat on track with your classes, but you’re bad at seeing them. They’ll knock on the door to check on you, but you pretend you don’t hear it. The door to the darkroom hasn’t been opened since the incident. You can’t look at your pictures anymore without thinking of the pictures of Alex, eyes open but not seeing and skin looking so, so pale. You still haven’t changed the lightbulb, and you closed the blackout curtains again. This time, you think they’ll stay closed. The ring is still on the table.

 

  It is two months later and your mom visits. She comes in and calls your name because it’s so dark she can barely see, and you might not even be there. She hugs you and cries, telling you that you’ll ruin your eyes. You go home with her to visit Wiggins. He teaches you to use oil pastels, but hides the darker colors because _boy, I’m sending you home with something bright._ You draw a field of flowers and it’s terrible but Alex would have liked it. You think he probably would have put it up in a place that he could always see. You can almost hear him declaring that _I know it’s messy, but I like it and I want to be able to look at it every day!_ You bring it back home with you and put it in that box over in the corner with all of his other things.

 

  It is a year later and you’re using your darkroom again because you remember all of those pictures you took of him, of the sunlight he brought to you. You want to see the sun again. Your hands are shaky, but you develop the pictures anyway.

 

   The pictures were taken on ruined film and are completely black.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed it! Please comment feedback, it helps keep me motivated and helps me know what you guys do and don't like!
> 
> Follow me on Instagram at @archangelica_angelica or on tumblr at innersanctuaries if you want to get in touch or just to watch me shitpost!


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